BESTINE – In what bantha enthusiasts are calling a major upset, Hnrkjjjk won ‘Best in Show’ in this year’s Bestine Bantha Show. Hnrkjjjk’s owner and groomer, Flor Plaato, said the massive beast’s unorthodox fur stylings put him over the top for the win.
But some in the industry say the creature’s large golden perm is not considered fair play.
“It’s an abomination to the bantha showcase,” said one anonymous contestant, who plans to compete next year and doesn’t want his name printed. “Brushing, washing, maybe some fur highlights, but that’s it. No perm.” (Emphasis added)
Some say the world of Bantha showing left the traditional path long ago.
“Ever since they started to allow artificial horns, I knew my days in the competition were numbered,” said four-time winning groomer, Po Huurr.
“You’ve worked hard all year to keep your bantha’s horns nicely maintained — no chips, nice grain — and now you’ve got some pudu for brains off the street with these carbon-fiber horns they bought in a store across the street. Give me a break.”
Nevertheless, winning owner Plaato still has faith in the competition.
“A win for Hnrkjjjk is a win for a change for the better in bantha showing. This is nothing but great news for us.
“Lead, follow, or get out of the way. And that’s one big bantha, so I suggest getting out of the way. Seriously, here she comes. Please step aside unless you want to get squashed.”